Our trip to Haiti

Shane and I left Tuesday (Dec. 14,2004) evening for the airport. We decided to stay in a hotel in Woodland because of the fog. We didn't want to miss our flight the next morning. We arrived at the airport with all 4 tubs and 2 carry-ons a piece. I was able to arrange a skycap to take our luggage while I parked the car. 2 of the tubs were over the weight limit but the man at the counter told me not to worry about it! As we waited for our flight I tried to explain to Shane what he was going to see while we were in Haiti. It's not easy to explain to someone who has no concept of poverty in a third world country, if you haven't witnessed it first hand you can't understand it.

We flew to Dallas/Fort Worth and had a 3-hour layover. We hung out in the airport, had some dinner and waited! By the time we finally made it to Fort Lauderdale it was 11:00 p.m. We have friends, Lane and Wanda Laubscher, that moved to Florida 16 years ago and they met us at the airport. We went to a hotel where they had booked a suite for all of us to stay in. Wanda, Shane and I stayed up until 2:30 a.m. talking and looking at pictures. It was really nice to see them after so many years. Lane drove us to the airport the next morning at 5:00 a.m.; 2 hours sleep is not enough!! It was going to be a long day!

We arrived in Port au Prince at 9:00 a.m. Thursday morning and Shane was pretty over-whelmed. He was tired and scared! We were able to find our luggage and get through customs without any problems. We went outside and the porters/sky-caps where very insistent that we not leave the immediate area. I guess things had been really crazy the day before and they were worried about our safety. I couldn't find anyone from the orphanage and couldn't find the phone number. Because of the language barrier I wasn't able to get through to them who I was meeting. Finally I remembered that I had a picture of Vanessa in my bag. I took that out and showed it to them and they knew who she was!! One of the men went looking for her for me. He came back with William!! Praise God! They wouldn't let William past the gate and they wouldn't let me out! It was crazy! If I hadn't had that picture who knows how long I would have waited.

William had come with Vitel and we were loaded into the back of Vitel's truck (very much like a tap-tap). Shane got his first taste of Haitian roads, cars honking, passing and swerving. He was so happy when we made it to the "O". Familiar faces greeted us. The guards and Nanny's remembered me from the last trip. I never even made it upstairs! I just dropped everything by the stairs and went to find my kids! The nanny's knew we were coming and had Sutton all dressed up and her hair done! Landon was also dressed in his best. The Nanny's knew that both kid's parents were visiting but did not realize that they were going to the same home. It was very sweet when they realized that I was there to see both of kids the Nanny's clapped! Landon was a little shy at first but quickly warmed up. He had been walking a little but really took off with our help and encouragement. We spent the most of the first day getting to know the kids and visiting with Anne. Anne is 18 and was planning on a mission’s trip with her church. When it got cancelled she decided to come anyway! She is a very sweet girl who spent 85% of her time downstairs with the kids. She played with them and held them and loved on them. It was so good for the kids to have that interaction. She made a point to spend a little time with each child. We also got to meet Jimmy, Dominique and Nicky. The boys had been living with Father Michael and when he passed away last month, Vanessa took them in. Jimmy is 22; he is still in school and will test for his completion certificate at the end of the school year. He is a beautiful person inside and out! I really enjoyed getting to know him and we want to help find him a university in the states to attend. He would like to study engineering. Vanessa was telling me that some schools provide scholarships to students from third world countries. It would be awesome if we could find him something close to us. I would love to be "Mama" to him while he is in the US. Dominique is 18 or 19 (can't remember) and also in school. He reminds me of my son, Andrew. Mischievous and a little bit on the goofy side! He loves the kids at the "O" and spends time with them. His favorite is little Christopher; it's going to be hard on him when Christopher goes to his forever family. Dominique enjoyed teasing Shane and Anne and drove them both a little crazy! Nicky is the youngest at 13. He had only been with Father Michael a few months and spoke very little English. He is still working on living with a family and it's obvious that he spent quite a bit of time on the streets. He has a big heart and wants to please. He's friendly and loving but a bit of a handful. The older boys have really been working with him and it shows the love they have for one another. Vanessa is hoping to get him in a boys program soon.

The rest of the first day was spent putting together Christmas gifts for the children at Father Michael's school. We were delivering them the next day and we needed to get all 511 of them done before dark! Mommy-ma made a wonderful dinner of Haitian chicken, rice and salad. Electricity was rare this trip but it wasn't too bad since the inverter was working. The biggest problem was the inverter isn't strong enough to run the water pump or the air conditioners. So no showers and the office where we slept was pretty hot!

Friday morning we got up and quickly got ready for the trip to Father Michael's. We loaded 4 large tubs and all of us (Vanessa, Anne, Me, Shane, Jimmy, Dominique, Nicky and Rosemond) into the back of Vitel's truck and set off for the school. We drove for about 30 minutes but only went a few miles. In the states the trip would have been 10 minutes at the most. The roads are so bad and there really are no driving laws so it's chaos all the time. The funny thing is it's more like "organized chaos". To an outsider it appears that there are no rules but to the locals there are "unwritten driving rules". Vitel got us there in 1 piece and the kids were all very excited to see us. It took over an hour to distribute the gifts. The school is in a 2-story building with 6 rooms on the first floor and 5 rooms upstairs. Each room has 30 to 40 students in it and the desks are so close together that you must climb over them to get to the back of the room. The kids were dressed in their best clothes and several of the classrooms sang for us. It was quite overwhelming for us. After the children got their gifts Vanessa talked to the parents and let them know she was doing everything she could to try and keep the school open. She also talked to the teachers and let them know the same thing. We then went to lunch at Fabrizzio's, an Italian restaurant with Father John and Alex, 2 men who are running the school since Father Michael died. The food was good and the restaurant looks like any other Italian restaurant I've been in. When we left Fabrizzio's Alex needed to make a stop at a copy place, as we waited for him several children approached us and asked us for money. Vanessa told me not to give them money because most of them are in a "gang" and they must give the money to the leader. Instead we offered them food. Vanessa always tries to carry granola bars, cereal bars or something similar with her that way the children get something to eat. We gave a cereal bar to 1 little boy and soon several more approached us. It was very hard for me to see these broken little souls with so much pain in their eyes. These children were young, maybe 5 or 6 years old and should be playing and going to school, being loved by someone, instead they live on the streets trying to stay alive from day to day! It's heart breaking!!

We made a few more stops then went shopping for souvenirs. Vanessa knew a good place that was safe. As we looked at the items for sale people trying to sell us things surrounded us. We walked up and down the street and had fun bartering with them. We had been there about 20 minutes when Vanessa told us it was time to go, I guess word had spread that there were Americans with money out and people started gathering around us. It could turn ugly quickly so it was time to leave!! We were able to get quite a few gifts in a short period of time. We stopped by the house that Vanessa is hoping to rent for us to see it but the guardian was not there. We hung around for a little while and met the neighbors. Several neighbor boys came outside and started playing soccer. Shane was able to join them and he had a lot of fun. The neighbor across the street came out and talked with Vanessa for quite awhile, she was very nice. Her husband is a judge and they both said it would be nice to have the orphanage in the neighborhood. We later found out that the Swiss Ambassador also lives on the street. It is in a much nicer area than the current house. St. Joseph's home for boys is only 1 block away. Vanessa had met the man who runs it before so we went to say hi. The home is 7-stories and absolutely beautiful. There is artwork and paintings everywhere. We were taken upstairs to the veranda to visit. As we were walking up the stairs we heard singing and guitar playing. The boys were receiving their weekly lesson. There are 12-15 boys, ages 8-20, and a teacher on the veranda, they stopped what they were doing and came over and gave us a traditional Haitian greeting, a hug and a kiss on the cheek. They then went back to their lesson. The amazing thing about it was they were only a few feet away from us and we were still able to talk without shouting. They were quiet and respectful. It was refreshing to see the respect they have for others, such a rare quality in young people in our society.

We went back to the orphanage and Mommy-ma had dinner ready for us. I'm not sure exactly what it was- beef with okra, rice and salad. I didn't eat the beef because of my stomach but Shane said it was good. We spent the evening relaxing and playing with the kids. Bedtime was early since we were all tired from being at the school.

Saturday morning we got up early and went back to the house. We met the guardian there and he was able to show us around. The house is very nice. Two-stories, a big back yard and another building in the back that would work for a school, it would be really nice to have the orphanage move! Vanessa and Gretchen are looking into what will be best for the "O" and the children and should make a decision soon.

We were planning a trip to the Baptist mission but decided against it. There was stuff that needed to be done around the "O" and I really wanted to spend some time with the kids. We played all day and worked on putting together the Christmas gifts for the Nanny's and other staff. Mommy-ma made us dinner, again!! Red beans and rice, chicken and salad. She is an amazing cook! I spent a lot of time with Landon, playing with him and getting to know him. He was calling me Mama and really seemed to bond with me quickly.

Sunday morning we went to church at St. Joseph's. We took Esperenica, Nicodem, Judline, Egline, Marie, Landon and Sutton with us. We also had Jimmy, Dominique, Nicky, Vitel, Rosemond, Shane, Anne, Vanessa and myself all in Vitel's truck! On the way traffic was stopped to allow the Prime Minister's motorcade to pass. It was quite a sight!! Very large men with automatic weapons in very nice BMW's, Mercedes' and Hummer's. The men reminded me of our secret service except they carry their weapons were everyone can see them. When we arrived at St. Joseph's we kind of took over the place. It's usually just the staff and the boys and here we were with women and children. The service was beautiful; the boys take turns running it. We sang several praise songs in English and a few hymns in Creole that we recognized the tune. During prayer I was very moved by the depth of emotion the boy's showed. Even though they spoke in Creole and I could not understand the words it was obvious to me that they were worshipping God, with their heart and soul! We took communion and sang some more. We video taped the whole service and really enjoyed the music. The kids really enjoyed it as well; it was a special treat for them because they rarely leave the orphanage! Eglin ended up falling asleep but the other kids sang and even "read" the bible! Very cute!! On the way home we stopped at the Caribbean Market to pick up a few last minute items for the party. It looked just like a grocery store in the states except it had armed guards in every aisle. I was able to get a cold Diet Pepsi, such a treat in Haiti! By the time we got home we had some really tired children! Even the older girls took naps! Vanessa had a visitor; a pastor and his wife came by to say hi. While waiting for Vanessa the man walked around a little. Most of the kids are pretty shy around men and they were all a little nervous. I was in the toddler room when he walked in and Christella, one of the most shy of the bunch, started crying. I went over and she let me pick her up for the first time!! She put her head on my shoulder and cuddled with me! I was very touched because she normally would run away from me. After the pastor and his wife left we had a quick lunch, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and then Vanessa went to lie down since she wasn't feeling good. Shane, Anne and I played with kids that were awake and I was able to get on the Internet for a while. When Vanessa woke up we decided to get to work on the party. We needed to set up chairs, get the food ready and make punch. We tried to make the Nanny's feel special and let them know how much we appreciated what they do for the kids. William prayed for us and then Jimmy and I read the story of Jesus' birth. I would read a verse in English then he would repeat it in Creole. It was really nice. Each person got a gift and a card. They ate every bite of the food we made and drank most of the punch. The party didn't last that long since they all had to get home before it was too dangerous to be out. The Nanny's who were working that night seemed to enjoy their gifts and we tried to spend time with the kids so they could get changed. I got Landon to say Dada finally so we videotaped him for Jody. It was really cute; it was dark so the light on the video camera came on. Landon would not say a word; he just stared at the light! We finally turned off the light and he started saying it over and over again! You can't really see him but we can hear him and that's what matters! I think Landon knew something was up because he was especially clingy to me. He would fall asleep in my arms and when I tried to put him in his crib he would start screaming! I finally had to have Jimmy take him downstairs and put him to bed. Every time I tried he would wake someone else up!! We then spent an hour or so packing and getting ready to leave. It was a hard night for me. There was a lot of gunfire and I knew I was leaving in the morning so I didn't sleep well!

I got up the next morning around 5:30 a.m. I couldn't sleep and I wanted to spend as much time with the kids before I left as I could. Landon was whiny and clingy and did not want me to leave the room. He was fine as long as I was holding him so he had a permanent place on my hip!! Sutton was her usual happy go lucky self and ended up falling asleep right before we left. When it was time to leave, I started to cry. I took Landon downstairs and handed him to one of the Nanny's. She saw my tears and started to cry as well. I'm crying, Shane's crying, the Nanny's are crying and poor Landon is screaming Mama!! I was able to thank the Nanny's and hug everyone before I left. The last thing I heard as I left was my little boy crying for his Mama! It was really hard on all of us! Shane cried all the way to the airport and Rosemond just sat with him, with his arm around him trying to comfort him. It was very special for Shane, he had become very close to Rosemond while we were there!

The rest of the trip was uneventful except for almost missing our flight in Dallas. We had a 3-hour layover and were sitting at our gate reading. I guess we had tuned everything out when I realized that they were making an announcement about a gate change about our flight! They had changed our gate to another one in another terminal and we had 15 minutes till boarding!! We walked as fast as we could to the nearest "trAAin" (American Airlines tram) and made it to our gate with just a few minutes to spare! We arrived in Sacramento 15 minutes before Carsen arrived from her mission's trip to Costa Rica. We were all very tired and COLD! Big difference in temperature for all of us. By the time we got home at 2:30 a.m. I had been up for 24 hours straight and desperately needed a shower. I took a quick one and got into bed.

It took me awhile to fall asleep though. I realized that we take so much for granted here. The hype about gifts and trees and clothes really take away the true meaning of Christmas. Carsen and I had a long talk about loving one another and making church about God and not what someone is wearing or who is paying attention and who's not. We have so many distraction in our society that it took me going to a country that has so little yet are so thankful for what they have, to really appreciate how blessed I am! I have so much to be thankful for yet spend a great deal of my time worrying about things that are so unimportant! I really look forward to returning to Haiti. I hope to be able to take Carsen with me next time.

We are praying that the kids get through the Haitian courts quickly and will be home sometime this summer!

Passport nightmare

Hi! I just had to tell all of you about our nightmare experience yesterday!! We had to drive to San Francisco to get Shane's passport since we are traveling so soon. We made an appointment for noon collected all the documents we needed and left the house at 7:45 a.m. for the 4 hour drive. Major fog was the first thing we encountered, thank goodness my husband was driving. Despite the fog and heavy traffic we made it to the city on time. We found a parking garage ($1.00 for every 15 minutes!!!). We went through security and then waited in line. When we finally got to see someone they told us the birth certificate I had for Shane wouldn't work, it was the shortened "abstract" version and they needed the long form. NO ONE EVERY TOLD ME THAT!!! They said there was a way around it but we would have to wait and speak to someone else. We waited and was finally told that he could get an amended passport good for only 1 year. We had no choice so we did it. We then were told to come back after 3:00 p.m. We were not expecting this, I was told on the phone to expect about 1 hour for it. We decided to go have some lunch. We ended up paying $18.50 for parking for 1 1/2 hours, crazy!!! We went to the wharf and had a nice lunch at "Bubba Gump's" but I didn't look at the price's prior to ordering (which I usually do!) The bill for the 3 of us was $80.00!! OH MY GOSH!!! You would think the shrimp was gold plated!! We walked around the wharf which was nice and then headed back to the INS office. We decided not to park so Jody went in and I circled the block. He called me on my cell phone and said the passport wasn't ready and to park and come up because it was going to be awhile.
I found a meter and figured it had to be cheaper then the garage. I went up and we wiated the 40 minutes they told us to. When I went up to the counter they informed us that the machine was broke and to come back on Monday!!! I was very upset, explained the 4 hour drive each way. They said we could wait awhile to see if it would be fixed. We realized that our meter was going to run out so Jody and Shane went down to put more money in, It was after hours so he could not get back in the building and the guards said if I went down to let him in I couldn't get back in either!! They were outside with no more change and I had both sets of car keys in my purse!!! He was gonig to beg any "meter-maid" that came around not to give us a ticket if the meter ran out. I waited and waited and waited and prayed and prayed and prayed!!! Finally they started calling names and thank you Jesus they called his name!! I was so happy!! We got his passport just before the meter ran out and we were able to head home. Of course now we are 4 hours behind schedule in rush hour bay area traffic. My sister-in-law had the little kids and had a party to go to. We called everyone we knew to pick them up for us and finally found some friends who could!! We got home at 11:00 p.m. 16 hours later, a whole lot less money then when we started but we had his passport.
WHAT A NIGHTMARE!!! I don't think Satan wants us to do what we are doing. He always puts "stuff" in our way when we are doing good things. But God is bigger, greater and better than Satan and in the end He won!

Going to Haiti

Shane and I leave for Haiti in 9 days. We are gathering supplies and are excited about going. Please pray for our safety and for the health of the kids. I'll post pictures and the story of our trip when we get back.

Our Dossier is in Haiti!!!

We are soooo excited. It's finally there. The only thing left to do now is wait!!! And wait!!! And wait!!! It may be this time next year before we bring the kids home.

I'm going to visit on December 15th and I'm taking Shane with me!! He is really excited at being able to meet his brother and sister. We will be there for 4 days and will return home the same day Carsen comes home from Costa Rica. Jody, Dylan and Kynsley will be the only ones home for a few days. Should be interesting around here!!

I'll post more pictures when we get back!! Thanks for the prayers!!!

We may have financing!!!

If everything goes right we should have the money we need through a private loan by Tuesday of next week!!!! Please keep us in your prayers. I'm praying our Dossier is in Haiti by the end of next week.

It's been taking between 8 and 10 months after the dossiers reach Haiti for the kids to come home, of course that's if nothing political happens in the mean time. It may be up to 1 year before our children are home!!!

There was a report published last week that said if Haiti doesn't get help soon the government will not be able to operate. Violence has increased and people are starving. There has been several countries (including the US) that have promised financial aid. If these country do not send the Aid they promised more people are going to die.

It will take years for Haiti to get to a point where they can support themselves but with help it is possible.

Latest Update

We are finally done with our dossier. Unfortunately we can not send it to Haiti because we do not have the money necessary to proceed! We are working hard on trying to find fundraising ideas. We've looked into getting loans but none of them were feasible so now we wait!!! I know God has a plan for us and He will provide the money in His perfect time. I need to be patient and not try to do it on my own.

I want my kids home so bad that I'm willing to do just about anything. Please let me know if you have a fundraising idea, no idea is to out-landish!!!

Please keep us in your prayers!

Landon Douglas Angelo Gray

WOW! I'm a mother to 7 children. We've added Landon to our family. He will remain at Angel House with his sister Sutton until we are able to bring them home! It probably won't be until this time next year but it will be worth the wait. Landon is 15 mos. old, his birthday is July 13, 2003. That makes 3 July birthday's (Carsen-22nd and Sutton-30th) and our anniversary. Landon and Sutton are 1 year and 2 weeks apart, the same as Dylan and Kynsley. We are very excited!!!

Landon 3 mos.

Landon 4 mos.

Landon 7 mos old with a Nanny

Landon 11 mos.

Landon 1 year old

The International Adoption Process

A lot of people have asked me to explain the process we have to go through for this adoption. I don't really understand every step but I'll try to explain it the best I can.

Our first step was to get an international home study done. We met with a social worker 2 times. She talked to us and the kids. She then wrote a report that detailed our housing arrangements, financial situation and our parenting style. It also talked about our upbringing and current relationship with our extended family.

While we were waiting on the home study we were gathering lots of paperwork. We had to get certified copies of our birth certificates and marriage certificate. We had to get a letter from our bank saying we have accounts in good standing, a letter from the police department showing we had no criminal history. We had to get physicals, complete blood work-ups and meet with a Psychiatrist. We had to get 3 reference letters. We also have to provide 3 months of bank statements and 3 years tax records. A lot of the stuff had to be notarized and most of it must be translated into French!!

We are currently waiting on our translations. When we get them back 3 of the documents must be sent to the Haitian Consulate in Chicago for "legalization". These same documents also had to be authenticated by the Sec. Of State. All this means is the state certifies that the notary we used is licensed in California and the license is current. We drove the documents to Sacramento last Friday so we didn't have to wait 10-14 days to get them back. When we get the documents back from the Haitian Consulate then our Dossier is ready to send to Haiti.

Unfortunately, this is not the end of it!!! Now we have to go through the Haitian courts for 1st legalization (making sure all the documents are legit and in order). Our Haitian Attorney has to submit a ton of stuff with our Dossier, ie. Birth mother's birth certificate, proof that the baby is legally available for adoption and several other things that I don't understand.

After 1st legalization then we go into IBESR (Haitian Social Services). The director of IBESR must approve every family that wishes to adopt. This step has been taking 3-6 months!!! It's a big waiting game. So many countries have been complaining about the delays that the Haitian government may replace the director. Which could be good if they quickly pick a new one or a bigger delay because the new director may take even longer since they are new and want to review everything that's been done recently before approving any new adoptions!!!!

Once released from IBESR then we go into 2nd legalization (checking again to be sure everything is legit). After that things can go pretty quickly if everything is in order, the big "IF". The baby's passport must be obtained, we have to meet with the INS (American Consulate in Haiti), and if DNA is ordered we wait on that. If all goes well then the baby's VISA is issued and she comes home!!

The process is very long and nothing makes sense!! The steps are confusing and some people get through really fast and others excruciatingly slow! We are praying ours goes quickly but are expecting it to take months!! We don't expect her home until this time next year. If it's earlier then we will feel blessed!

Sutton

kissing daddy

So cute!!!

I love my mommy

playing with Daddy

lovin' on Daddy

naked girl