the guys...

People come and go from our lives, 

some staying only for a while, 

some much longer. 

Then there are those that although physically present for only a short time

 make memories that last a lifetime. 

People who are placed in that particular place and time for reasons we may never understand. 

People who help shape us; 

people that in any other circumstance we may have missed the opportunity to know. 

This is the story of a few of those people. 

A few men that came into our lives, made an impact on us and will forever be a part of our family.

The kids and I had only been in Haiti a few days and needed a little break from unpacking and getting used to moving to a third world country. 

Carsen was only going to be with us for a few more days and I didn’t want her whole time with us to be revolved around work.

 So we headed up to a local hotel to enjoy their poolside restaurant. It was crazy busy and we ended up sitting in the corner far from the restaurant which wasn’t ideal.

 But...

I’m so glad we did because that set in to motion a friendship that has lasted through the years.

There were a couple of Americans at the pool. 

It wasn’t uncommon to see other Americans at this particular hotel. 

Ex-pats, missionaries and UN employees were regular visitors. 

I often said hello just because of the common language. 

This particular day, 

with the kids being kids and people obviously getting annoyed with them, 

I didn’t have time to talk to anyone. 

As we were getting ready to leave I briefly said hello with no intention of engaging in conversation. 

Luckily one of the guys, curiosity getting the best of him, asked me if I ran an orphanage. 

The look on his face when I told him, “no these are all my kids” was priceless! 

We ended up talking a little. 

In the process I learned that he was a military officer stationed in Haiti. 

The female with him (who I assumed was his girlfriend/wife) was actually also an officer in the military. 

There were 2 other men with the team that I met later. 

After finding out I was waiting for Jody to join me I was given each of their phone numbers as contacts if I had an emergency. 

It was a kind act on their parts, one they certainly were under no obligation to do. 

I didn’t think I’d ever use it or see them again. 

A few weeks later I needed some “me” time so I left the kids with our nanny, grabbed my iPod and a book and headed to the hotel. My plan was to have a cold beer, 

get some sun and read my book without talking to anyone! 

It was quite a surprise when the people I met a few weeks prior were already at the pool. 

The entire group lived at the hotel. I ended up talking with them for hours and made plans to have dinner the next night with them. 

I was missing adult interaction and felt safe with the group. It was a fun evening. It was that night that I knew I’d met people I’d be friends with for a long time.

Jody’s deployment was delayed and as days turned into weeks these guys; two of them in particular, became a huge support system.   

Navy Commander Rob Dunsmore and Coast Guard Lieutenant Commander Dan Van Buskirk 

hung out with Shane, played with the little kids and helped keep me sane. 

They even talked to Jody on the phone to be sure he was OK with us being around them.

 Most of my experience with the military was negative; young, enlisted guys who didn’t respect women. I honestly had a poor view of military personal. 

These guys were different. 

Although they were crass, told off color jokes, swore like “sailors”, smoked a mean cigar and were known for throwing back a few; they were respectful, polite to women and obviously loved their jobs. 

The group often said that Dan was the too smart to be in the military. He is the only person I know that has most of the constitution memorized! 

Dan tutored Shane for his American Government class since I’m completely inept in that area.

Jody was finally deployed and I couldn’t wait for him to meet “the guys”. 

I was excited for him to know that my spending time with a sailor, a soldier, an airmen and a coastie really was a good thing! 

The night we were meeting the guys was also the night Dan returned from leave. Before he left he asked me if I needed anything from the states. Simply for the shock value I told him I needed some  

underwear 

because that’s just the way I am. 

When we walked up I noticed a package on the table. After introductions Dan hands me the bag and tells me he got me something from the states.

 I assumed he bought something for the kids. 

Well my little joke came back to bite me when I opened the bag and found 3 pairs of panties that his wife had picked out for me! 

He had told his wife about our family and how I tried to embarrass him. She thought it was hilarious and went to VS and bought me 3 pairs of the most beautiful panties I’ve ever owned. 

It truly was one of the sweetest gifts from a woman I’ve still not had the pleasure to meet. 

(Lisa I really think we need to change this!)

 And what an introduction for Jody!!! 

Thank goodness my husband has a great sense of humor and was quite impressed that Dan was able to beat me at my own game. 

… a little note here…

I questioned adding this, 

I know there are people who would read into it and think it was inappropriate, 

but it truly wasn’t. It was simply a sweet gesture and a great joke. 

If I had said I needed kitchen utensils Dan would have brought those too! 

That’s just the kind of guy he is!

 Jody, Rob and Dan were like long lost brothers from different mothers. 

They had rude nicknames for each other (which eventually led to me being called “the queen” because Jody was referred to as “your royal bleeping highness”), they acted like 12 year olds and I was more often than not the “victim” of their pranks. 

I really didn’t mind. 

I had two 

“big brothers”

 to turn to when I couldn’t reach Jody because he was in the remote areas of Haiti.

They “had my back” and I knew without a doubt they would do whatever necessary to protect our family. One incident stands out the most.

 Rice prices had gone up dramatically which caused severe hardship for the Haitian people. 

Rioting ensued. 

We were in “lock down” mode and hadn’t been able to get supplies for several days. Things calmed down a bit and Jody was able to get to the remote area where he worked. 

Shane and I decided to take advantage of the moment of calm and rushed to the grocery store. 

As I was leaving the store my phone rang, it was Rob. 

Jody had told him we were out shopping. There were no pleasantries and when he called me Gail 

(Rob always called me “the queen”) 

I. Knew. Something. Was. Wrong.

 He asked me where I was and when I told him at the store he told me

 “get the h**l out of there! NOW!” 

At this point we were at the car and I was loading groceries into the back. 

I had given Shane the keys so he could start the AC. I yelled at Shane to drive. 

We didn’t have time to switch places.

Shane was only 14 at the time but...

I. Didn’t. Care.

We needed to get out of there. 

A new set of rioters were coming up the street the store was on and were approaching fast. If we had taken the time to switch places it is highly likely we wouldn’t have missed the mob. As we took a corner I could see the people marching within a few hundred feet of us. 

Rob was able to tell us which streets to take and which to avoid. 

Without his assistance there is no doubt in my mind Shane and I would have been caught in the middle of an angry mob and I chose to not think about what the ultimate outcome of that would have been. 

This is the ONLY time I have ever felt fearful while in Haiti. 

But, that fear was lessened by a guy who took the time out of probably the most stressful day he experienced while on this mission to call me. 

Their time “in country” came to an end way to soon. 

As they prepared to leave Jody and I knew their absence would leave a void in our lives. 

It was a sad time for us.

 Little did we know that the group that came in next, although different in many ways, would become just as dear to us…

(to be continued)