Well...
Jody got the phone call for his interview. He's not sure how it went. The guy asked him a few questions and that was it. He was told he should know something by Monday or Tuesday.
I'm going to be really honest here. I have some real fear in my life that I can not let go of!! Fear that at times seems to want to take control. I feel strongly that Jody will get the call from the State Department on Monday and his leave of absence will be granted. But, there are times my mind (ie. Satan) plays tricks on me and starts to say What if...
What if Jody isn't offered the job??
or if he does get offered the job...
What if he isn't granted his leave of absence?
It scares me....Really, really scares me!! I DO NOT want to spend 6-12 months away from my best friend, my support, my husband. I was asked today at church if I was afraid to be in Haiti and the answer is no, it's not Haiti. It's being without Jody that scares me. I'm a better mother, a better friend and a better person over-all when I'm with him. My stress level is always manageable when I know he will be home soon. I need him. PERIOD!! The kids need him.
BUT, I'm trying to keep my eyes on my Heavenly Father, I know that God has called us to this. I'm not sure what He will teach us being separated but I know without a doubt that He is the one asking us to go. If Jody doesn't go, there has to be a reason. And God will get us through it, no matter what we want or think or do as long as we stay focused on Him! He is in control and not me. I'm trying really hard to stay strong in my faith but it's not easy.
We had a great sermon on faith today and one thing pastor said really stood out to me. He said,
"Faith is the statement your life makes about God." I want my life to speak clearly that I trust God, that I love God and that I follow Him even when it hurts!! Being separated from Jody will hurt, hurt really bad. And during the dark times, during my weak moments, times that Satan loves to get a hold of me, I have real fear! Fear that makes me question, "Is my faith strong enough". I pray the answer is YES!
7 comments:
Thank you Gail for being so open & honest about your feelings & fears. I understand how you can feel that way. I don't like being separated from Randy for even a day. Praying for the Lord's will to be done & that His peace, joy, & comfort will fill you both.
Gail.....my heart goes out to you. i feel the exact same way about my husband. he's my best friend......know i'm praying for you and your family...
love,
missy
I'm on the prayer train with ya!
You and Jody have an amazing marriage. I totally understand. He is your leader! God placed him in that position. Praying for you during this scary time. Your life definitely portrays faith. How else could you explain packing up your HUGE family in 16 tubs and heading to a foreign country? Now that takes faith!!! :)
Well, you didn't actually pack your family in those tubs...he,he. :) That would really take some faith.
Gail, I believe with all of my heart that it is not the will of God for you to be apart from Jody. He, the Lord, the maker of the heaven and the earth, put this desire in both of your hearts. He is a faithful God. He will make a way even when things are impossible. Praying for peace in your and Jody's heartstoday and expecting a great report!! Love ya, sister!!!
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