Saturday, September 06, 2008
Friday, September 05, 2008
Family Photos
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Trust
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13
Todays message at church included this:
"What if the life you really want, and the future God wants for you, is hiding right now in your biggest problem, your worst failure, your greatest fear?" Mark Batterson
I will...
"Trust in the Lord with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding" Proverbs 3:5
Bad News Has Come
My request to have my current leave of absence extended from my job at the Vacaville Police Department was denied. The main reason cited was staffing levels are so far down that they cannot afford to have me gone and continue to hold my position for me until I return in March of 2009. So, as of right now I will have to be back at work no later than September 28 or lose my job. This brings up a lot of issues.
Isaiah's adoption is not anywhere near completed so he cannot leave Haiti. There is an issue with Landon's passport as well. We were told it would be easier to resolve the problem in Haiti but we have come to find out it is not. Therefore, he is currently "stuck" here and not able to leave the Country either. We are working on resolving the issue BUT.... it's Haiti!
I'm not ready to leave Haiti yet. But......I'm also not ready to face the real possibility of being unemployed in March of 2009 when my contract with the UN runs out if I do decide to stay here and "retire" from Vacaville. If I come back now, I will have to rent a place in Vacaville for me and the three oldest kids (Shane, Dylan and Kynsley) because we will not be able to afford to send them to private school in Haiti on my salary in Vacaville.
Gail will have to rent a small apartment here and keep the three little ones (Landon, Sutton and Isaiah) with her. I do not relish the thought of her being in a volatile, third world country without me. We did it for 2 months before I got deployed but things are more unstable now and this would be for a longer period of time....maybe as long as 6 months.
So......lots of things to pray for. So please do. And, if anyone has any ideas......don't keep them to yourself. Our heads are spinning with the possibilities......including a resume and contact I made regarding a possible job in....England. We will keep you posted.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
what I miss....
...clothes that are not stretched out, damp, faded or crunchy. I NEED a washer and dryer!!
...being able to "hide" the dirty dishes in the dishwasher!!
...driving on well maintained, paved roads.
...meeting my friend, Lynn, at Starbucks an hour before school let out. Not so much for the coffee but for the time we got to spend together, talking about anything and everything. AND... getting a little pick me up before the afternoon ritual of homework, soccer practice, football pracitce, ballet, dinner etc, started.
... yes, I miss Taco Bell. I really love the food and the ease for when the afternoon ritual is just too much to handle (see above).
...my pastor Bill and my church, Neighborhood Church of Redding. I miss the amazing preaching, the excellent worship and our small group, the people there becoming like family. I miss Awana's for the kids and knowing I could walk into that building and find God's love, freely given out. I miss Thursday morning Woman's bible study and Leslie Hall's unique way of leading. I miss the bonds that I started to form before we left.
BUT... most of all, I miss my family (natural and extended). My mom, Jody's mom and sisters, the Painter's, the Vivit's, the Schmeck's, the Faires... so many more. I miss seeing their faces, hearing their voices... knowing that they would be there in minutes if we needed them.
Maybe, it's time for a trip home????
(All pictures used WITHOUT permission, sorry, Pastor Bill, I couldn't find a picture of the church, so you were the next best thing!!)
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
PICTURES!!!!!
WHERE......
And what do you do to entertain the children?????
Watch Lassie on the computer!!! Thanks for the movie Carsen, it entertained all 6 children ;).
Today Jody went to work or I should say, tried to go to work. This is what they encountered along the way.
Rivers overflowing and....
washed out roads.... as well as....
A group of stranded Peruvian Military Officer's on their way to the DR....so....
the team had a brief meeting and decided....
...to try and help. Needless to say they all got wet and very muddy. The UN truck was still stuck in the mud when the guys left but help was on it's way.
We will see what tomorrow brings!!
By the way... it took me over an hour to get these pictures to post. Hopefully, it will get better... I do not have the patience necessary to sit and wait for pictures to load.
Gustav
School has been cancelled for our kids again today. Port au Prince was not hit hard; I hear that it rarely is. BUT, we are hearing of massive flooding in Jacmel, Les Cayes and other outlying areas where they suffered the brunt of the storm.
I have never been in a hurricane before so I wasn't sure what to expect. I've watched the news from Florida and other states and what I experienced was nothing like what I thought I would.. We experienced surges of wind and rain, hitting every hour to hour and half. Between the surges it was eerily calm. Haiti is a country of sounds: people shouting to one another; singing; church bells ringing; tap-taps honking; diesel engines revving; roosters, pigs, donkeys and dogs all fighting to be heard; children playing; constant sound. Yesterday we heard none of that; just the sound of the wind and rain and then… silence.
Of course, we were 50-75 miles from the eye of the storm and so we did not get the worst of it. However, for Haiti it isn't necessary for the eye of the storm to pass over to cause problems, it's the "fringes" that do the most damage... the rain... the wind... the flooding... the cold. In a country that has stripped its mountains of vegetation, that has no sewer system, that does not have any sort of emergency preparation procedures in place, whose rivers are unable to handle the deluge of water, with people who have no access to television or the internet the results can be devastating. Denial is also a huge factor. I read reports of people saying there was no storm coming because it was sunny out! Haitian’s I talked to here seemed to dismiss the possible severity of the storm.
It saddens me to see the devastation that occurs that is so preventable. People have already died and most likely there will be more. People who are starving and need to get food will try to cross rivers that are not passable. Mudslides will occur; the land just can not hold this much water. Levies will break, villages will be swept away. All of which is preventable with time and effort. Unfortunately once the threat has passed, more pressing concerns will get in the way and replanting trees, fortifying the river banks, educating the people etc. will be put off once again. People will die, children will be left as orphans with no where to go since the orphanages are already filled to capacity.
It’s a cycle that has been going on for hundreds of years. I have no solution for the problem. But, I can do something… I can pray!!
I pray that the cycle can be broken; this country has enough heartache as it is.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Huricane Gustav
*****UPDATE #2 BELOW****** (3:36 p.m.)
Hurricane Gustav is expected to hit Haiti sometime today. School was cancelled. Jody hasn't heard yet if he is going to work or not.We do feel safe where we are. The eye of storm is expected to hit southwest of Port au Prince. We live about 10 miles southeast of downtown Port, in Peguyville, near Petionville. It rained off and on all night. The rain is getting heavy as I type. No wind yet but I'm sure we will feel it soon. We are running to the market now to get more food. If we have internet I'll post more later.
We made it to the market, it was not crowded at all. There weren't a lot of people on the streets though.
The winds have started. It blows continually with huge gusts that bend the trees in half. I wish I had my USB cord so I could post pictures. There was actually fog in Haiti today. Very unusual!! It is warmer today in San Francisco then it is here!!
The kids have prepared for the onslaught... they built a fort in the middle of the living room. Blankets, pillows, sheets, a bookshelf, even a mop!!! They are prepared.
We discovered that The Weather Channel (TWC) is only concerned with how this storm will affect Labor Day plans for the US, not when or where it will hit here in Haiti. Very sad!! We are relying on The National Hurricane Center for our updates... or looking out the window whichever is easier. I'm surprised we still have internet access, I'm sure we will lose it soon. I'll post updates as long as I can.
So far lots of rain and some wind. The storm hit just outside Jacmel. We are expected to get more rain over night. We haven't left the house so I have no idea how bad it is in the streets. I just heard from a friend that works by the Embassy and there was some serious flooding there. We have other friends that work closer to downtown PAP, I'll try to get info from them as soon as possible. We are praying for the people of Jacmel and the surrounding area.
Monday, August 25, 2008
A few more prayer requests...
According to the Naitonal Hurricane Center-
"SATELLITE AND SURFACE OBSERVATIONS INDICATE THAT THE LOW PRESSURE AREA LOCATED OVER THE CENTRAL CARIBBEAN ABOUT 250 MILES SOUTH OF SANTO DOMINGO CONTINUES TO SHOW SIGNS OF ORGANIZATION. UPPER-LEVEL WINDS ARE FAVORABLE FOR ADDITIONAL DEVELOPMENT...AND THE SYSTEM COULD BECOME A TROPICAL DEPRESSION AT ANY TIME TODAY OR TONIGHT. WATCHES AND/OR WARNINGS MAY BE REQUIRED FOR PORTIONS OF HISPANIOLA LATER TODAY."
It is very calm right now.... almost too calm. Rain today would keep the violence at bay but too much rain will cause problems as well. I'm praying for just enough rain to keep people inside but not enough to cause additional flooding.
It looks like we will be getting some serious rain in the next 24 hours. I'm praying the storm decreases in size or stays at the depression level and does not develop into anything more. I'll post more when I get home from work (4:30 p.m.) if we have internet. You can also check http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/ for updates.
Update #2- 4:57 p.m.-
Tropical Storm Gustav is headed our way. The rain has already begun. It looks like the eye of the storm will hit southwest of Port au Prince sometime tomorrow. Please, continue to pray for those in the path of this storm. We feel we are safe where we are but most people in Haiti can not say that. Flooding is sure to happen and history shows that many often die in the aftermath of flooding. If we have internet I will continue to post updates if the situation changes.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Prayer requests
So here goes...
Pray for wisdom with our finances. 4 of the kids started school last week and it is very expensive. We also need to find the money to have Carsen's car shipped to her ASAP. She has been borrowing a car from the Varner's and they need it back.
Health... I have a nasty head cold with body aches and fever. I feel all around pretty rotten.
Praises... I am now working at the kids school as the afternoon librarian. One of the benefits is a reduction in tuition so that is helping some. Pray that I can learn the job quickly and can be a positive role model to the students who use the library.
Pray for Isaiah's adoption, we are currently in MOI, we are hoping for a fast exit and to get through the US side of things quickly. We are praying that his adoption is done by the first of the year.
Also, for Carsen who left today. She is lonely and misses her family. School is starting soon for her and she is going to need to juggle a full load while working. She needs her car!
For Jody who goes back to work tomorrow. He has been on vacation and there have been several changes while he was gone. Pray that he is not affected by the many transfers that have been happening.
Pray for the kids as they adjust to their new school.
Thanks, friends!! When I am feeling better I'll fill you in with the details of my new job and the kids school, but for now... I'm going to bed.
p.s. Spell check isn't working and I feel to crummy to figure out what is wrong... so please excuse my horrible spelling :)
Friday, August 22, 2008
We've been busy!
- Shane, Dylan, Kynsley, and Landon all started school this week. They look so cute in their uniforms. You'll have to trust me because the cord to the camera is still missing.
- Mom got a new job. She'll tell you all about it later.
- We're going to the beach tomorrow. Yay!
- I got to go out to Dad's work and do an impromptu wound clinic in the nearby village.
- I helped out at Halo's last week. What an awesome team!
- Today I spent the day with the kids at TA's. Oh how they are growing up!
- Yesterday I spent the day at Heartline ministries and got to be a part of their prenatal class and learn more about their women's program. Again, what an amazing group of people.
- I leave on Sunday and am not ready!!!
- We took family pictures today thanks to Troy and Tara Livesay. We pretended to like each other long enough to get some good photos. ;)
- We need to make over our blog, but we're all lacking in the "blog design" department. Any suggestions?
I will post my photos when I get home because I also don't have my USB cord.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Monday, August 04, 2008
Happenings...
On Friday Jody got to go on a helicopter ride in a 20 year old Russian military helicopter, flown by a 4 man Ukrainian helicopter crew. Along for the ride was a US Army Lt. Colonel, 2 Brazilian military officers and one of Jody’s partners from El Salvador. It was a joint effort to locate possible smuggling routes between Haiti and the Dominican Republic. It was a chance for them to see the border in places they can not access yet by car. They stopped for lunch at a Nepalese Military camp and were treated like kings. He got some great pictures (which are for now stuck in the camera, because when we moved we misplaced the cord to download to the computer).
On Saturday evening we went to a going away party for a few people leaving the mission. The party was at the PAE house (the staff for Jody's contractor, PAE, live and work there, the house is also open to families to use the pool, play games, use the international phone etc). The party was small (horrible rain storm kept most people away) but it was nice to get to know a few of the other officers and their families who are visiting for the summer. I volunteered to make Tuxedo Brownies for the party so I spent the day baking with help from the whole family. After the party, Jody and I went dancing for a little while. Unfortunately, on the way out, the heel of my high-heels got caught in a gap between the cobblestones and the top landing of the stairs and I most ungracefully fell on my “keester”. In the process of my tumbling, I twisted my ankle severely. However, the most important thing is I did not break my favorite shoes!!! Hurts pretty bad but I have not seen a doctor yet.
On Sunday I went to church with Shane, Dylan and Kynsley. It was a great service and God really revealed Himself to me. I am currently praying about some serious stuff and will share it once I have Godly confirmation to do so. We were planning on taking the kids swimming in the afternoon but the rains started up again and we were unable to go. So… we napped instead. There is nothing like a good Sunday afternoon nap when it’s raining. We made homemade pizza for dinner, read a few books to the kids and then watched pre-season football. It was a nice ending to a busy week-end.
Today, Shane went to Quisqueya Christian School to do pre-testing for the 9th grade. Landon will do his tomorrow. Unfortunately, we are not able to afford for Dylan and Kynsley to go so they will be home schooling, unless we are able to get some financial aide or I get hired by the UN (I applied for a position awhile ago and have not heard anything yet). I read the book of Ecclesiastes today twice, once in NIV and once in the Message. A fellow blogger put out a challenge to read it, so I did. I’m still processing what I read.
That about sums up the last few days. Not very interesting, but it’s our life!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Happy Birthday, Sutton!
The building was five times the size of my desolate dwelling, it seemed like a fortress. One of the board of directors was visiting from the Land of Opportunity and took the garbage bag from my shocked mother. The director solemnly took my body and mentally prepared herself to arrange a burial. Just like the part in the Red Sea, Jesus parted the clouds and shone a new light on my face. The director discovered that my feeble lungs were still fighting for strength to breath and my heart was faintly beating. I was dropper-fed every hour. I was so weak physically that I could barely find the might to eat, but my spirit was much too strong to give up. Drops of life and love came and filled me until I slowly began to be revived. My revival was a miracle, but my mother still would have no way to take care of me. She did the hardest thing a mother would ever have to do: she agreed to place me for adoption. Those at the orphanage still weren’t sure if I was going to live. I was weighed at the orphanage, but didn’t even register on the scale. I finally reached five pounds after six weeks of life.
Meanwhile, God was working his intricate plan, weaving hearts together. My story was told to a family whom lived miles away. They had their own plans in their heart: they were going to adopt one child, a boy. Lucky for me, God is sovereign and omnipotent. This family began to pray for me and through the power of prayer, our hearts interlocked. My picture was sent to this family and when the mother of the family saw my face, she knew I was hers. The father was much stronger and resistant, for the heart of a man is penetrable in ways much different than a woman’s. The heart is the core of a woman, it controls her actions, guides her. The mother of the family rebelled against her mind and did what only her heart told her to do: She went against her husband and placed me on hold for adoption.
It took longer for the father to see God’s plan, but God continued to call him. A friend saw my picture and said “you have a beautiful daughter.” His heart then melted. Faster than anyone expected, the adoption was on its way. The family had an emotional discussion and asked my soon-to-be siblings if they were ok with adding me to the family. Paperwork was filled out and plans were made to visit me.
Then the day came when I met the people that I was already connected to through love. I had never seen a man so light before and he intrigued me. His hold was firm and strong and I knew he was my daddy. My mommy was gentle and warm and I molded into her arms as if I’d rested there all my life. Eleven months later, I was on my way to live with the people who had dwelled in my heart since that fateful day I emerged from the womb in a dirty Haitian shack.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Some heavy thoughts...
We persevered… Jody was deployed, we bought a car and a refrigerator, the home owner finally bought the stove, and we found a new nanny (who is AWESOME). We still had very little money but at least we were all together. During all the transition time, I did not seek out to do “anything” except exist in Haiti. I did not want to seek out a ministry, a place to serve. I prayed for God to reveal it to me. And waited! And waited!! And 7 months later I’m still waiting. This is never easy for me. I’m a “doer”. I like to be involved; I like to feel “needed”. A few weeks ago I got the chance to participate in helping a family finish their adoption and get their kids home. I felt alive, at my best, it felt so good to be “involved” again. Adoptions have been my passion, my calling. It is what I do best. The joy that comes from watching a family come together after so many months of struggle is something I can not put into words. To see how God brought people together, in His grace, in His timing, in His perfect way is amazing. But, that was a one time thing, not an ongoing place to serve. So now what?
I’m beginning to question why I’m here. Why is it that God moved our family to a third world country, if He did not want us to serve Him here?? There are plenty of places I could just get involved in, good places, but I do not feel that’s what I’m meant to do. But, if not them…where?? And is it possible that there isn’t anywhere for me here?? Is being in Haiti not about us serving? It’s a strange feeling for me… to do nothing. Don’t get me wrong, I still have things to do… I do have 6 kids here… a house… responsibilities… but I would have all those things in the US but with 24 hour electricity, with a car that has AC, with the safety of living in the US. So why here?? Should we pack it in and go home? Were we wrong… are we meant to be here? And if not, then what?
I’m not sure what these ramblings are really about. I have no idea why I feel I need to put them out there for everyone to see… take the chance of being judged… of getting advice I do not want to hear. I don’t know why, yet I’m compelled to do just that. So I will. And in doing so, take a step towards trusting God to direct our paths further… whether or not we want to hear what He says.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Happy Birthday, Carsen!
(Sorry for the old picture, I have no new ones!!)Sunday, July 13, 2008
Monday, July 07, 2008
I want a bird
I am a giver. I love loving others. I’m like a moth to a light when it comes to someone in need. I don’t do it because I have to or because I want people to like me. I do it because I love giving. I love sharing with others and making people feel cared for. However, I have a very hard time accepting gifts or letting others take care of me. I find it incredibly hard to graciously accept gifts, compliments, and help. This goes the same for my relationship with Christ. I strive in my sinful nature to love God to the best of my ability, and he loves that. I’m learning that God is a romantic God who wants to be pursued (just like every woman) and repeatedly calls Christians to “follow, seek, ask, knock” (women, isn’t that what we want from others in our life?). And like any lover, the Lord loves to give in return. This is where I’ve been failing my Lover. I have not been letting Him in. I have not allowed Him to romance me because I’ve been believing the lies of the Enemy: that I’m not special or worth any extravagant love.
There is a story in Captivating where John goes down to the beach for some quiet time with the Lord. While on the beach he sees a magnificent whale up close and personal. He comes back to tell his wife, Stasi, of the gift God gave him. The next day Stasi is on the same beach enjoying her quiet time with the Lord. She prays for a whale. She wants to feel the wild love of God and his good gifts too. She is heart broken when no whale comes. As she heads back, she comes across a beautiful orange starfish. She smiles and thanks the Lord for His gift. As she rounded the corner, she was met by another surprise from her Savior. She tells the story: “There before me, behind me, surrounding me, were hundreds of starfish… There were purple ones and orange ones and blue ones, all sizes. I burst into joyful laughter, my heart exploding inside me. God didn’t just love me. He LOOOOOVED me! Intimately, personally, completely” (Captivating 117).
I have been wanting to ask the Lord for such an act of romance as this, but haven’t because I was allowing the lies and fear of disappointment to hold me back. This morning I went on a bike ride. The air smelled amazing and sent old memories soaring to the surface of my thoughts. The air smelled just like my fondest memories: pine, bark, and salty ocean air. It was as if the Lord sent the Northern California breeze just for me. I smiled and thanked him. As I was riding, I was reminded of the story I just shared. Without much thought I prayed, “I want a bird.” I pedaled for a few more seconds and saw a beautiful bird sitting in a small tree that sat just on the end of a corn field. “God, I want that bird. And I want it to fly with me.” My heart was pounding as approached the tree where the bird was perched. “Would he come through for me?” Right as I cycled past the tree, the bird whistled and swooped down next to me. He then flew next to me and in front of me. He even did a turn and some fancy acrobatics. The faster he flew, the faster I rode, though he was never more than a few feet away. He flew next to me until I reached the end of the road. Tears just started rolling down my cheeks and my heart was filled with giddy laughter. I am special! My God does love me enough to give me extravagant gifts! My heart has been romanced. I am in love and am loved in return!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
We are grandparents!!!!!
Kayden Makoa Gray ( 7 lbs. 12 oz., 20 in. ) arrived at 1:08 a.m. on Wed. June 25, 2008. Both mom and son are doing good. We will post pictures as soon as we get them.
OH MY GOSH!!!!! WE ARE WAY TOO YOUNG!!!!!!!!








